Why do I look different in photos than in the mirror?

• The flip. Every face is a little asymmetric: a parting, a higher brow, a smile that lifts more on one side. In the mirror those sit on the familiar side. In a photo they swap, and the brain reads the swap as something being off. People tend to prefer the version of their face they see most, which for you is the mirror and for your friends is the photo.
• The lens. A phone held closer than arm's length makes whatever is nearest look bigger. The nose and the middle of the face swell, the ears and jaw recede. A mirror has no such effect, because you see your reflection from twice the distance.
• Light and the moment. In a mirror you see a moving face and adjust your angle without thinking. A photo freezes one instant, often mid-blink or mid-word, under whatever light happens to be there. Overhead light hollows the eyes; light from the front fills them in.

Neither, entirely. The unflipped photo is closer to what others see, but a close lens and bad light make it less fair than a person standing across the room would be. Other people also see you moving, talking and changing expression, which no single frame captures. The true mirror shows your camera un-flipped, so you can get used to the version others see and check each half of your face.

This matters for ratings too. Every rater, human or AI, scores a photo rather than a face, so the same setup problems move the number. Is an AI face rating accurate explains why, and facial symmetry covers how much asymmetry is normal: some is universal.

1. Face a window or other soft light in front of you, not a ceiling light above.
2. Hold the phone at eye level and at least at arm's length; a timer and a shelf work better still.
3. Keep the chin level, the face square to the lens and the expression relaxed.
4. Turn off beauty mode and filters.

Photo quality: light, angle and lens explains each rule. If you plan to ask a chatbot for an opinion, the same photo rules apply; see how to ask ChatGPT to rate your looks.